Lonely, unhappy, dissatisfied in my relationship

I began working with Alison approximately 10 months ago due to some issues I was having regarding a relationship. After 6 years with my boyfriend, I realized the entire past year I was extraordinarily unhappy, lonely, and dissatisfied. I felt if I didn’t leave the relationship then, I might never get out and be unhappy forever. I felt very righteous in this decision, but knew I needed to learn to take responsibility for how I felt, both on my own and in the relationship.

While at first I approached therapy as an attempt to remedy how I was feeling, I realized quickly that growth is a slow and often unpredictable process. I also realized that gaining self-awareness and self-discovery would not only help me heal from what felt like a major insult to my sense of self, but also to lay the groundwork for better coping with and handling the inevitable pressures and challenges of life.

Alison encourages an approach that focuses on being “Self-led.” Basically, she coaches and helps me to, gradually over time, build a base of inner strength and resilience that helps me adapt to everyday challenges, remain grounded and steady in the face of crisis, and to improve my relationships with other people. My ability to understand and relate to other people, especially in challenging situations, is a direct result of having more compassion and empathy (including towards myself!).

I came to have a tremendous sense of compassion for the partner I separated from, and gained a lot of insight into how we both got to where we were, and how we were equally culpable. I’m slowly rebuilding the parts of myself that have been long fractured, and reconstructing the relationship I walked away from. It’s not so much a “repair” as it is the building of a new connection and understanding of ourselves and each other altogether. I’m a new person. Each day I’m becoming a better version of myself; a version that I’m learning to fall in love with.

– CP, 31 year-old female